


What We Deserve

by Leahelisabeth (fortheloveofcamelot)



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Injured Neil Josten, M/M, Paramedic Neil Josten, Surgeon Andrew Minyard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-12-26 16:21:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18285899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortheloveofcamelot/pseuds/Leahelisabeth
Summary: Surgeon Andrew Minyard doesn't want to admit he's kind of into the redheaded paramedic he sees every morning at the hospital.  If Neil Josten hadn't ended up on his operating table, he might never have said anything at all.





	What We Deserve

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the AFTG Reverse Bang for requiemofkings amazing artwork.

A rhythmic bumping at the foot of his bed brought Andrew out of a deep sleep. The dream he was lost in dissipated with a gasp as he sat up in the dim light.

“You slept in and we’re out of milk,” Aaron scowled at him from his chair.

“Shit.” Andrew sighed and dropped his head into his hands. “What time is it?”

“Almost 6 am.” Aaron turned his chair and wheeled himself out into the kitchen. “Better hurry. I want cereal for breakfast.”

“Can’t you make some eggs?” Andrew asked, shivering from the cold as his feet met the cheap laminate flooring. “Where the fuck are my slippers?”

“We’re out of eggs too,” Aaron shouted from the living room. “And you left your slippers out here last night.”

Andrew groaned and made a dash for the bathroom. He turned the water on full hot and hugged himself for warmth while he waited for it to heat up.

He was tempted to stand and bask in the warmth but time was ticking down until his shift and Aaron still needed breakfast. All too soon he was standing out on the bathroom rug, shivering again and dripping everywhere. He toweled himself off roughly and made another quick dash back to his bedroom in the nude. The armbands went on first, always. And then he hurriedly dressed in his scrubs and was headed out the door.

He had no time to go to a real grocery store and they weren’t open at this hour anyway so he ran to the gas station on the corner and picked up milk, eggs, cheese, and a loaf of whole wheat bread.

He hurried back home and dropped the bag of groceries on the kitchen table. Aaron wheeled himself in and looked through the bag.

“There, options,” Andrew said. “Happy?”

Aaron shrugged. “You know me,” he said.

Andrew looked at his watch and swore. No time to waste, he strode out to his car and roared off to work.

He got there at 6:25, a few minutes later than he liked but still on time, and sighed in relief. He wasn’t going to miss his favourite time of the day. He stood in the corner of the locker room, holding his lab coat in his hands. The pretty redhead paramedic strode in beside his much taller partner and headed straight to his locker on the opposite side of the room. Andrew began slowly pulling on his lab coat while the paramedic, Neil, grabbed his gear from his locker.

Andrew held his breath until, just like every morning, Neil looked over, smiled, and waved. Andrew nodded, trying to keep his face as impassive as possible, and left the room to go sign in. It was the only time their paths usually crossed during the day. Neil was usually gone on another call by the time his patients arrived in his operating theatre.

One of these days, one of them would speak but apparently, it still was not today. Sometimes Andrew would daydream about running into Neil at the end of his shift. And he would be surprisingly alert after his shift. Maybe Neil had a slow day too. And he could ask him to go out for drinks after like normal people do and he could tell Aaron not to wait up without feeling the yawning expanse of guilt in his middle for leaving his brother alone again and for breaking his promise. 

Andrew tuned back in to realize he was being paged to the surgical suite. It was probably for the best if nothing happened with the paramedic. There was too much in his life as it was.

It was a busy day and Andrew threw himself into his work with his usual focus. The world narrowed to his steady hands and the patient under them. There was less than an hour left of his shift when that changed.

He heard Kevin’s voice first, choppy, breathless, frantic. He turned, startled out of his hyper focus, and he saw red hair and the tatters of a paramedic’s uniform. Smoke filled his nostrils, undercut by the scents of burning flesh and spilled blood. And then Neil Josten was facedown on his operating table.

“Are you ok, Dr Minyard?” The nurse asks when he doesn’t immediately begin. He looked at her. He thinks her name is Kayla or something. She’s new.

He nods and pulls himself out of his spiral, looking away from that red, red hair, now frizzled and singed. He wishes he could see Neil’s face. “What happened?” he barked at Kevin, even as he’s pulling away the rest of Neil’s uniform and assessing the damage for himself.

“We somehow managed to beat the fire department to a fire in an apartment building. There was a kid screaming from a second floor window. And Josten’s always been an idiot who wouldn’t know self preservation if it bit him on the nose. I tried to stop him but he’s just so fast,” Kevin said, pulling at his hair in worry.

“Did he fall through the window?” Andrew asked, taking in the lacerations, the multiple embedded pieces of glass, and the numerous burns that littered his body. He tried very hard to ignore the old scars beneath the new layer of wounds. Privacy didn’t exist on the operating table but Andrew couldn’t help feeling he was intruding on something he wasn’t meant to see.

“Something exploded,” Kevin choked out. “He shielded the kid. The firefighters found them both under a pile of rubble when they got there. The kids fine minus a little smoke inhalation, but Neil…”

Andrew nodded. “I have work to do. You can go.” 

“I don’t want to leave him,” Kevin admitted.

“You can watch from observation,” Andrew said, already assessing the pieces of glass with his critical eye, trying to decide which ones were most urgent. Finally he slipped back into the right headspace and Neil turned into just another body under his knife.

By the time he finished and Neil was wrapped in bandages and ready to go to the ICU, Andrew was exhausted. His mind registered that his shift was over and he could go home but he found himself following Neil down to the ICU instead and watching as the nurses got him settled. Kevin appeared at his side but Andrew didn’t acknowledge his presence. 

Eventually Andrew looked at his watch and realised that he was already an hour late getting home and and Aaron would be wondering where he was. He didn’t want to leave. Kevin had found a chair and was settled in for the long haul and there was no reason for him to still be there. He waved at the guy every morning. It isn’t like they were married. If Neil woke up without him, nothing would happen. Neil wouldn’t miss him. He could leave with a clear conscience. But he stood there for another few minutes anyway, watching the rise and fall of Neil’s chest.

“What are you still doing here?” a nurse asked from behind him.

Andrew was shocked out of his thoughts and turned to look at her.

“Nothing,” he said and walked away. His steps were slow and heavy as he walked down to the locker room. He fished around in his locker for his phone, groaning as he saw that he had about sixteen texts and four missed calls, all from Aaron.

He didn’t read any of the texts, just sent back a terse, **on my way,** and trudged out to the car. Before he pulled out of the parking lot, he thought his return home might be better received if he arrived with food so he called ahead to Aaron’s favourite Thai food place to order takeout for dinner. It might add another ten minutes to his commute home but it would be worth it.

“So you aren’t dead,” Aaron said from the darkness of the living room, when Andrew pushed the door open, arms laden with food.

“I brought food,” Andrew said, trying to ignore the pit of guilt in his stomach.

“Right, so you can ignore my calls and texts, take your own leisurely time, knowing that if you die I’ll either die here slowly or go to a home and die there slowly, but it’s okay, you brought food,” Aaron scoffed.

Andrew felt anger flaring hotly because this shouldn’t be his life, chained to his adult brother, but he tamped it down and ignored it because it was his fault and he deserved this. Instead of replying, he walked past Aaron to the coffee table and set down the bags of takeout and then fled upstairs to shower. Aaron might bitch about it but he was entirely capable of getting his own plate from the kitchen and serving his own food.

By the time he walked back downstairs, hair dripping and feeling clean without feeling surgery clean, he had cooled down and was ready to spend the evening in the same room as his brother.

“One of the paramedics was in an accident and needed surgery,” he finally offered. “I stayed to make sure he was going to be alright.”

Aaron grunted in response and turned the TV on. Andrew sat down on the couch and helped himself to the leftover Thai food. He sat and ate, letting the sound of the TV wash over him.

* * *

The next morning, Andrew didn’t need Aaron to wake him up. His eyes popped open at 4:00 am and he stared into the darkness. His dream had been unsettling and he wasn’t sure he wanted to remember it. He closed his eyes again, chasing sleep but it was long gone. A chill was in the air and the last thing he wanted to do was leave the comfort of his blankets but he knew what he would be thinking about if he lay in bed with nothing to distract him. 

He took a deep breath and threw off the covers before rabbiting across the room to his fur lined slippers and his warmest hoodie. The coffee maker went on first and then he mixed up a batch of crepe batter and let it sit. He hopped into the car in his pyjamas and went to the nearest open convenience store with a criminally overpriced fresh food section, picking up strawberries, blueberries, bananas, heavy whipping cream, and cream cheese.

Andrew loses himself in the cooking process, fixating on slicing every piece of fruit perfectly evenly, trying to get the crepes as thin as humanly possible in the frying pan, whipping the heavy cream with the cream cheese and adding hints of cinnamon and vanilla, and then assembling the crepes into rolls. He tried to pipe the cream on in an artistic manner but even his steady surgeon’s hands were no match for his lack of artistic talent.

“I’m still mad at you,” Aaron said, cutting through his focus and startling him. He almost dropped a plate.

“This isn’t an apology,” Andrew said, wiping up a bit of stray cream from the edge of the plate. “It’s just breakfast.”

“And this isn’t suspicious at all,” Aaron rolled his eyes and grabbed a rolled crepe off one of the plates and took a huge bite. “Nightmare?” he mumbled through a full mouth.

“I guess I just wasn’t that tired,” Andrew said before taking his own giant mouthful.

“Bullshit, you’re a surgeon, you’re always tired,” Aaron scoffed. “Is this about your friend?”

“He’s not my friend.” Andrew winced. He had said that both too loudly and too quickly. He looked up at Aaron and grimaced because he recognized that look, the thinly veiled disgust, the barely bridled anger.

“You promised,” Aaron growled at him before setting one of the plates in his lap and wheeling into his bedroom.

Andrew looked at his plate and his stomach turned. He covered it in plastic wrap and put it in the fridge. He still had an hour before he needed to leave for work but he found himself getting ready and hopping into the car anyway.

Andrew did not mean to visit Neil. He told himself it was just professional courtesy, after all, Neil was one of their own. He would do the same thing if it had been Kevin who were injured. He was just going to stop outside the door for a few minutes, read the chart and make sure everything was going well, and then he would go find a dark corner to rest and caffeinate before his shift started.

He would have stuck to that plan too but when he reached Neil’s room, Kevin was just leaving.

“I was just...”Andrew waved his hand to indicate the chart. “Uh...how is he doing?”

“Why don’t you come in and see for yourself?” Kevin asked, opening the door wider behind him.

“Oh no, that’s alright.” Andrew protested.

“You’d be doing me a favour. I’ve been sitting there all night. Have to pee like crazy and I could really use a coffee,” Kevin frowned down at him.

“He’s in a hospital bed. It’s not like he’s going to go anywhere,” Andrew stared up at Kevin, face as impassive as he could make it.

“You obviously have never seen Neil when he gets bored. Look, he’s sleeping. He’ll probably keep sleeping. But if he wakes up, he will start running. Just a couple minutes,” Kevin pleaded.

“Fine,” Andrew sighed. And that is how he found himself sitting in a chair at Neil’s side and watching his chest rhythmically rise and fall. Neil’s face was remarkably unbruised but it was the only clear skin Andrew could see. He tugged the sheet up over Neil’s chest to hide the scars from view.

“What am I doing here?” Andrew muttered under his breath. 

Neil stirred at the sound of his voice. Bleary eyes opened. He looked around the room, a little panicked. His heart rate picked up and his breathing grew labored. He fumbled for the IV port in his arm while struggling to push himself up on his elbows.

Andrew stepped forward but stopped short of actually putting his hands on Neil. “Stop that. You need that.”

“Minyard?” Neil whispered through rough, dry throat.

“Uh yeah, you’re in the hospital. You’ll be fine,” Andrew said awkwardly.

“Why’re you here?” Neil asked.

Andrew cursed his fair skin as he felt most of the blood in his body rush into his cheeks. “Kevin said you needed a babysitter and I drew the short straw.”

Neil’s face fell a little. “Oh.” He relaxed back into the bed for a moment before trying to sit up again. “Kid okay?”

“Yes, he’s fine. You’re a big damn idiot but apparently also a hero,” Andrew scowled.

“Are you...mad at me?” Neil asked.

“I don’t care enough to be mad at you,” Andrew said with his voice flat and emotionless although all he wanted to do was hit the other man. He turned and nearly ran from the room, almost knocking Kevin’s cup out of his hand on the way.

Andrew’s hands shook as he dressed and got ready for work. He went and shut himself up in a bathroom stall, just breathing, but it didn’t seem to help. It had been years since he had felt the need to call Bee from work but his hands were already dialing the familiar number.

“Andrew?” A groggy voice came over the line after three rings. “What a pleasant surprise.”

Andrew felt guilt pool in his stomach like a rock. “I’m sorry I woke you,” he whispered.

Bee already sounded more alert. “Not at all. You wouldn’t have this number if I didn’t want you to call it. And I know you would never abuse that privilege. Do you want to tell me why you called or do you want me to talk?”

Andrew was tempted to sit in silence while she told him about her garden, her cats, or the books she was reading but the words were bubbling up on his tongue before he could swallow them back. “I almost lost my temper at a patient,” he said.

“Oh?” Bee asked. “What prompted that?”

“He’s an idiot. He is a paramedic at the hospital and he ran into a burning building to rescue some kid and he ended up in my operating theatre because of it,” Andrew said, his voice rising.

“I see,” Bee said carefully. “This paramedic...was it Neil?” 

Andrew groaned and dropped his head into his hands. “It might have been.”

“It’s okay, Andrew. Thank you for trusting me with all of this. I know it’s not easy for you. I want you to think to yourself and figure out what emotions you are actually feeling right now. I know anger is the one you find easiest to feel but is that the only one you are currently experiencing?” Bee asked gently.

“I am mad,” Andrew said. “Neil should never have gone into that building. It was stupid and risky.”

“What else?”

“I hate him because I was worried and he’s nothing to me. He’s just some guy I wave to before work,” Andrew burst out.

“Andrew, I know this isn’t new to you. I’ve told you this before. You’re allowed to want things for yourself. You’re allowed to do things that make you happy. You’re allowed to pursue a path separate from your brother’s. I think what is making your most angry right now is the missed opportunity. If Neil had died in that fire, you would never be able to move forward with any kind of relationship. I don’t know if Neil is the one for you or if you’d even like him once you’ve spent more time with him but I think you owe it to yourself to find out what you want,” Bee said.

“Is this your way of telling me you ship me and Neil?” Andrew joked.

“You and happiness, Andrew.” Bee chuckled. 

“Right,” Andrew sighed. “I’ve got to work.”

“You’ll think about what I said?” Bee asked.

“I’ll try,” Andrew promised before hanging up and rubbing a hand over his face. “Later,” he amended quietly before heading to work.

* * *

Andrew was exhausted by the time he finished his shift. He pulled out his phone when he reached his locker to see that Aaron had texted him.

_are u gonna be late again?_

**less late than yesterday but yeah** , he replied.

_you better bring food_

Andrew stuffed his phone into his pocket. It was the closest thing he was going to get to permission. He hadn’t been sure until that moment that he was going to stay but his feet were once again taking him to Neil.

He walked into an argument. Neil was in a wheelchair and glaring furiously at Kevin, giving no ground even though the much taller man was looming over him.

“I have to go back to work, Neil. I can’t just stay at your house and take care of you,” Kevin shouted.

“Then don’t. I’m a grown man and I can take care of myself,” Neil growled up at him.

“Your hands are burnt to shit. How are you going to feed yourself?” Kevin crossed his arms.

Neil tried to wheel around him but he flinched violently when his bandaged hands touched the wheels. “I’ll figure it out. I’m…”

“Don’t you fucking dare say you’re fine,” Kevin interrupted him. “You’re going to be completely immobile. You’re going to get an infection and I’m going to show up after my shift to find you dead on the floor because you did something else monumentally stupid. Now get back in that bed before I tell someone you lied about having adequate support at home.”

“You can come home with me,” Andrew stepped in and spoke without thinking. He kicked himself when both Neil and Kevin turned their ire toward him. “I mean, I’m a doctor. My house is completely wheelchair accessible and my brother is always there so you won’t be alone while I’m at work. It’s logical.”

“Your wheelchair bound brother. THe whole point is that Neil can’t do things for himself.” Kevin glared.

“But he has the use of his hands,” Andrew rolled his eyes. “He can make sure they both get fed and he can call 911 if something happens.”

“And I can pop in and help out,” a cheerful voice came from behind Andrew, making him jump nearly a foot in the area. The nurse who had assisted with Neil’s surgery, Katya, or Kendra, or whatever her name was, was standing beside him with a wide grin on her face.

“No offense, Kara…” Andrew began.

“Katelyn,” she interrupted.

“Whatever, but I’m sure we’ll be fine without you,” Andrew said.

“I’m sure you will. How about I help you get Neil settled and then we can discuss it further,” Katelyn smiled so reasonably and Andrew hated it.

Andrew thought briefly over whether he should call Aaron and give him a heads up but figured he didn’t want to give him the wiggle room to try and get out of it. He was going to be mad either way.

“Fine,” Andrew gave in. “Kevin, can you get Neil all checked out and make sure he gets any medications and meet me at the car.” And Andrew made his escape to the parking lot.

He sat behind the wheel of his car and clutched his phone. He looked at the screen, no new notifications, but he navigated to the messenger app and sent off a quick text to Bee.

**I’m going to try**

I’m proud of you

She texted back almost immediately and Andrew had a few more minutes to breathe and order pizza enough for five before Neil and the others converged on his car.

“I don’t need the chair,” Neil was arguing as Kevin pushed him toward the car. Andrew got out and came around the passenger side.

“Prove it,” Kevin scoffed. Neil planted his feet on the ground and stood. He lasted maybe five seconds on his feet before he was wavering and falling. Andrew was there, shoring him up from the side and bundling him into the car.

“We’ll keep the chair for now,” Andrew said roughly as Neil stared at him, open-mouthed, pupils wide from whatever painkiller he had been given to get him home from the hospital.

“You’re really strong,” he said with a smile on his face that made Andrew simultaneously want to kiss him and throw him off a cliff. He didn’t know what to say so he nodded and moved over to the driver’s side door.

“Get in or I’ll leave you behind,” he said before getting in and starting the engine. Katelyn and Kevin scrambled to get in and he didn’t wait for them to buckle their seatbelts before he was pulling out of the parking lot.

* * *

Andrew expected Aaron to be mad. And he was, at first. Then Katelyn walked through the door and Aaron sat up straighter in his chair than Andrew had seen in years. He brushed his messy hair out of his eyes and put on his most polite smile.

“My name is Aaron,” he said, holding out his hand for Katelyn to shake and completely ignoring Neil and Kevin in the process.

“I’m Katelyn. I work with your brother,” she smiled.

“He’s a lucky man. I would look forward to going to work if it meant I would be greeted with your smiling face,” Aaron gripped her hand a moment longer than necessary before releasing her.

Katelyn looked uncertain for a moment but the sheer sincerity on Aaron’s face seemed to convince her he wasn’t being a creep and she upped the wattage on her ever-present grin.

“Aaron, this is Neil. He’s going to be staying with us for a little while until he’s healed enough to go home,” Andrew said.

Aaron nodded. “It’s fine. Are you going to be around too?” he addressed Katelyn again. He wrinkled his nose as a thought occurred to him. “You’re not his girlfriend, are you?” He gestured to Neil.

She laughed. “No, I am currently unattached.”

“Good,” Aaron said, smiling again.

“And I don’t swing!” Neil piped up.

And whatever bubble of hope Andrew had been feeling until that point popped and drifted away on the breeze. He shoved whatever he was feeling down deep inside and focussed on getting Neil settled on the couch with a plate of pizza.

* * *

Later, after Kevin and Katelyn had left, Andrew settled in for an evening of television. Neil reclined on the couch and watched with him, occasionally making snarky comments about the show that Andrew mostly tried to ignore.

After a while, Neil’s comments stopped coming and Andrew looked over to see the other man fighting to keep his eyes open.

“It’s bedtime for idiots with no sense of self preservation,” Andrew said as he got to his feet and crossed the room toward Neil.

“Noooo,” Neil protested, forcing his eyes open and struggling to sit up, even as he lost his battle with gravity and sprawled over the arm.

“Neil,” Andrew started, crouching down to look Neil in the face.

“The painkillers…” Neil pouted.

“You need another dose?” Andrew asked, pushing himself up to go get the white paper bag.

Neil reached out and grabbed the hem of Andrew’s shirt. “No, I need to wait until they wear off. They’ll keep me too deep under.”

And Andrew understood. “Nightmares?”

Neil nodded. “Can we...just talk?”

“What makes you think I want to talk to you?” Andrew asked.

“That little wave every morning?” Neil smirked. “Just because I don’t swing, doesn’t mean I don’t have eyes.”

Andrew could feel his face burning and he couldn’t look at the other man and his blue, blue eyes. “I hate so much of what you choose to be.”

Neil laughed and gasped, clutching his side. “It won’t be very long. I can feel them fading.”

“You are a glutton for punishment,” Andrew said. “How about we get you into bed while you’re still a little numb?”

“Maybe that’s a good idea,” Neil nodded.

Andrew helped Neil to his feet and moved him to the wheelchair but Neil refused to sit in it. He rolled his eyes but helped the other man walk to his bedroom.

“I don’t want to take your room,” Neil protested when he got there.

“Of the two of us, who’s more equipped to sleep on the couch right now?” Andrew said as Neil’s knees buckled and he almost fell to the bed. Neil was still wearing pyjamas from the hospital so Andrew saw no need to embarrass them both by changing his clothes. He did swing by the kitchen and grab a bottle of water and Neil’s medication. “If the pain is too bad, take them.”

Neil nodded but Andrew had no confidence that he would actually follow through. He pulled the blankets up to cover Neil’s chest and stood to turn out the light.

“Can you leave the hallway light on?” Neil asked as Andrew reached the door.

Andrew stood there for a moment holding the doorknob in his hand. “Neil.”

“What?”

“We’ll talk tomorrow,” and Andrew left in a rush, leaving the door open a crack behind him. He sat down on the couch and realized that all of his things were in the room with Neil and he couldn’t go back in there now after his embarrassing flight. Moments later, a pair of sweatpants hit him in the face and Aaron sat across the room from him, a strange look on his face.

“So that’s Neil,” Aaron said.

Andrew shrugged. “What do you want me to say?”

“You could tell me the truth. About how you feel,” Aaron glared at him.

“What’s to tell? He doesn’t swing. And you know I promised nothing would happen,” Andrew said, still not looking his brother in the eye.

“Is that really all we have to look forward to now, just a miserable life in each other’s spaces? No future for either of us?” Aaron scowled.

Andrew straightened up. “I see. One day, not even, a few hours spent with a pretty girl and now you want to...what? Break our deal? Make her take care of you? There’s a reason you haven’t dated since…”

“I didn’t ask for this, okay? There were a million other ways it could have happened. We could have told someone…” Aaron protested.

“You never had the balls,” Andrew sneered. 

Aaron flung a pillow across the room, hitting Andrew square in the face. “You’re fucking impossible sometimes, you know? I’m going to bed.”

Andrew caught the pillow and placed it on the arm of the couch. He lay down and closed his eyes, shutting out his brother. He didn’t open them until he heard Aaron’s door close.

* * *

Andrew looked in on Neil after he woke up. The redhead was flat on his back, nose whistling and a line of pain between his eyebrows. The painkillers still sat on the bedside table. Andrew left him and went to work.

Kevin caught up with him before his shift started. “Can you take the cats too?” he asked with no preamble.

“What cats?” Andrew stared.

“Neil’s cats. He has two and they’re already driving me crazy. I am not an animal person,” Kevin begged.

“Is he a 90 year old woman?” Andrew asked.

“Just take them? I bet it will help Neil’s recovery. He loves those little monsters.” Andrew was immune to Kevin’s sad eyes but if it was for Neil…

And so Andrew carried a cardboard box with two cats into the house after his shift.

“Sir! King!” Neil made grabby hands toward the box and the cats jumped out and leapt on the other man where he was reclining on the couch. Neil gasped and wheezed, face going pale and tight with pain, but he gathered his cats into his arms and held them close.

“Thank you!” Neil had such a look of joy on his face that Andrew couldn’t bear to look at him. He strode into the kitchen to find it spotless and with Katelyn at the oven pulling out a casserole.

“You’re just in time for dinner,” she smiled pleasantly, putting the casserole on the counter.

Andrew was tempted to leave the house and come back in, hoping whatever alternate reality he had been transported into would snap back to normal. But it just kept getting stranger. Aaron wheeled into the kitchen with a smile on his face, hair trimmed and neatly combed.

“It smells delicious,” Aaron said, beaming up at Katelyn.

“What the hell?” Andrew asked, leaving the domestic scene in the kitchen to see something so sweet it made his teeth ache. Neil was wrapped up in a soft fuzzy blanket that Katelyn must have brought with her. His hair was clean and the curls fell into his eyes. The two cats were curled up together in his lap and purring loudly and Andrew knew this was something he would never get used to, but damn if he wouldn’t give it a shot.

Neil grinned up at him. “Come meet them.”

Andrew obediently sat down at Neil’s feet and reached out to pet the cats’ soft fur.

“The orange one is Sir Fat Cat McCatterson, and this little gray lady is King Fluffkins,” Neil smiled.

“That is absolutely ridiculous,” Andrew said, even as King padded over to drop into his lap and his hand reflexively came up to stroke her.

Katelyn brought in two plates of food and retreated into the kitchen to eat at the table with Aaron. Andrew sat on the couch with Neil and finally let his guard down to have a conversation. And he didn’t die of embarrassment. If he had ever had any sliver of hope that he wouldn’t like Neil once he got to know him, that was put to rest. It felt too good to have him here, warm feet mere inches from Andrew’s thigh and Andrew for once not wanting to shrink away.

* * *

Two weeks passed this way. The bandages on Neil’s hands came off and he was cleared to go back home. They had one last night before Neil would leave and there was a strange gravity as they sat in the living room for one last supper. They had the house to themselves. Katelyn had actually managed to get Aaron to leave the house with her and they were going on a date. Andrew could hardly believe it but it was happening.

“Where did you get your scars?” Andrew blurted out and immediately cursed himself for asking such a personal question.

Neil flushed and looked away. “My father. He wasn’t a good man. He only had ten years before my mother ran with me but it was enough.” He reached up and rubbed his shoulder where Andrew remembered seeing the imprint of a clothes iron.

“You don’t have to…” Andrew said.

“No, it’s alright. It doesn’t need to be a secret, not from you. The rest of these were from when we were on the run. He had a lot of power and a lot of minions and he sent many of them after us. I spent a long time on the run.” Neil petted the cat absently.

“Why did you stop running?” Andrew asked.

“There was a gunfight. My mom died. I was left for dead and someone called an ambulance. Kevin was one of the paramedics who saved my life. He stood by me as I helped the feds take down my father, helped me to get a new legal identity, and talked me into following his career path. Getting shot was simultaneously the best and worst thing that ever happened to me.” Neil shrugged, meeting Andrew’s eyes reluctantly.

“Where’s your father now?” Andrew asked hoarsely.

“Dead, shot in a raid. Good riddance,” Neil’s mouth twisted bitterly. “I’m glad I no longer bear his name.”

Andrew didn’t know what to say and the silence stretched out between them. “It was my fault,” he blurted out finally.

“What?” 

“Aaron’s paralysis. It was my fault. Our mother, beat him, fed him drugs.. He was a mess. I hated what she was doing to him. We were 12 and we were in the car and she was screaming at both of us. She wasn’t watching the road. I saw the truck coming at us but I didn’t say anything. I just wanted it to end. So I said nothing. When I woke up she was gone and Aaron had a broken back. I walked away without a scratch,” Andrew finally managed to dam the onslaught of words coming out of his mouth.

“Why are you telling me this?” Neil whispered, his eyes never leaving Andrew’s face.

Andrew couldn’t bear his gaze. “So you’ll know why I never spoke to you, even though I wanted to. I don’t deserve to be happy.”

Neil was quiet so long that Andrew finally looked up at him and he felt to his very core that he didn’t deserve to have anyone look at him the way Neil was now.

“If I asked you to kiss me, would you say yes?” Neil asked softly.

“What? But you don’t swing,” Andrew argued.

“It’s a yes or no question, Andrew,” Neil said, leaning in a little closer.

“But you don’t want…” Andrew tried to protest.

“If I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t have asked,” Neil whispered, so close now that Andrew could feel his breath on his face.

“Neil,” Andrew breathed.

“Andrew,” Neil shifted in closer but waited for Andrew to close the gap between their mouths.

And Andrew did. Somehow kissing Neil was exactly how he thought it would be while also being somehow more than he ever could have dreamed. When he pulled back, Neil’s lips were swollen and his eyes were glazed.

Neil grinned and laughed, a little giddy, before leaning in for another kiss. “You deserve to be happy, Andrew.” 

And for once, Andrew was.


End file.
